Teflon Don Trumps All of Politics

You knew it was coming. Here are my thoughts on the most entertaining, saddest reflection of 2015 American intellect: Donald Trump.

Voting is a waste of time. Politicians are crooks. Republicans are war-mongering villains.

That said, Trump is my favorite person to show his mug on television since Ron Paul.

That’s a big statement, I know. Don’t get me wrong, the libertarian rockstar Ron Paul will forever hold the title for best thing to happen to cable television ever. After all, he’s the reason I caught on to libertarianism in the first place. Without the litany of YouTubes, like the Giuliani moment, I may have never questioned the morality of the state, much less the efficacy of mainstream economics. New York real estate mogul Donald Trump will never speak to those who desire truth in the way Ron did, and does.

So what gives? Bottom line, Trump will go where no politician will. He’s a bombastic egomaniac, and if the bull-china-shop analogies weren’t already played out, I’d cite one here. This is a man who will tell the world on live television that he likes people who don’t get captured, unlike the treasonous, ironically POW-hating, communist broadcaster, and a head cheerleader for the bomb-Iran camp, John McCain. This is a man who will read out, no, who will provide a visual aid while he reads out the personal cell phone number of a fellow presidential contender. This is a man who will give a former Texas governor eyesight advice, who can piss off CIA-connected Mexican drug lords, and who strikes fear into the hearts of anyone daring to contend with him on the debate stage.

Politics is code for socially acceptable thuggery. It’s a disgusting, barbaric affair. Sadly, countless Americans are consumed in the race to determine the leader of the allegedly free world. That anyone can realistically conceive of the notion that one individual, if elected, could change the trajectory of this country–that is, to economic, moral, and social ruin–is mind-boggling. One man is small potatoes to the vast, deep state that actually runs this country. Just ask JFK.

Trump is mental break from this reality. His idiotic ideas about how to Make America Great Again have nothing to do with human prosperity, not to mention sound economics. Erecting trade barriers–a physical wall no less!–with neighboring countries, declaring economic war with politically unpopular Middle Eastern countries, and rhetorically blasting the fastest growing economy in the world are, in the vernacular of Trump, stupid thoughts. As doubtless as it is that Trump is a very wealthy, very powerful man, he is likewise a very stupid man in economic and social affairs.

But set this aside. Disabuse yourself of sober, intellectual reasoning. Instead, turn to Fox News. Or CNN. Or C SPAN. Or the Chicago Tribune. Or any other of the litany of media outlets to which Trump so graciously grants interviews. Admire the mindless tenacity of Trump as he steamrolls every talking head, pundit, and establishment mouthpiece. Reporters beware, you have no chance. Go against Teflon Don, and you will be Trumped.

This is the importance of a Donald Trump presidential campaign. He lambastes every critic without a spine, which in politics means the vast majority of critics. News anchors take to the airwaves to express their finely practiced astonishment that such a blowhard could be so highly favored among prospective voters. Don’t they get it? Americans love this stuff. Finally, someone has the gall, and the personal wealth, to tell it like it is to the politically correct opinion-makers in this country. Of course, none of what Trumpster has to say has anything to do with bettering the general welfare of the American population. After all, he’s no Murray Rothbard. But in the name of unity, can’t we all just get along, and agree that Donald Trump is the political hand grenade we all so desire to explode in the smug, spray-tanned, faces of our self-ordained political rulers?

I say this country needs a unifier, not a divider. And if anyone can unify us in our understanding that politics is a festering, infected, ingrown hair on the sit-bones of the human experience, it must be Trump. Forget Caitlyn Jenner! To hell with the Taylor Swift-Nicki Minaj twitter scuffle. The demise of sensible thought in America is best illustrated by the Don of American politics.

Worry not, citizen, although you can’t drive over 65 miles per hour on a wide-open highway, though your pension plans are likely bankrupt, though the purchasing power of your currency has plummeted for over a hundred years, at least you have Trump-ertainment.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.


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